Christmas and an Adventure

It was so amazing getting to be home for Christmas. It's so nice getting to be back up in Great Falls, Montana...the town is just amazing! It's my hometown. NO...I was not born there. I just grew up. So Christmas was lets say... interesting. I got to cook my very first turkey. It turned out really great. I'm not sure what the best part of making it was...It might have been playing with it while cleaning it or sticking my hand under the skin acting crazy...but it was a darn good turkey!

She is a beauty. I was kinda sad to see her get cut up....she is a girl right? Other news....I got to dress up my 8 year old cousin up and do her hair and make up just for a photo shoot doing the picture the way I wanted them. She is such a great girl to work with. Love her.

Monday...I got to tour the news station!!! How FREAKING awesome is that? I mean like how often do you get to tour a NEWS STATION!!! It was so fun. We spent about an hour there just looking at everything and talking about how they had nothing to cover and how an accident should happen so the news would have something to cover...1 hour later a car accident happened...cha ching! Later that night my brother borrowed my mom's car and well...I got a phone call at 10 pm of him freaking out cause the tire blew and he couldn't find the spare or figure out how to change the tire. Luckily I knew how to do it and helped him out the best I could over the phone while driving to him with my aunt.

Yup...there is no rubber left. Got to love that brother of mine. :)

Other news...today I did a photo shoot at some falls in provo canoyns and well....I fell in the waterfall...totally epic! I got up and started laughing for probably an hour straight. I didn't care that my leg was freezing...I thought it was funny...there is going to be pictures and a music video coming soon....stay tuned peeps! 

Peace out yoda!

<3 Rae

Walking On Water

Never thought the day would come when I would walk on water. Well, actually I didn't know it was possible till Tuesday. I went out with Chelsea to do a photoshoot at Utah Lake thinking we would see the myst of the cold and warm hitting each other. We got there and there was a guy standing out in the middle of the lake. Thinking in my mind that he is crazy and is going to kill himself. There was NO way I thought that the ice was solid enough to hold up a person's weight. We go down by the water and me being who I am....I walk out onto the ice!!!! CRAZY HUH? I know. Never thought in my life would I do something like this but here I was tuesday standing on the lake with Chelsea.

This is something I didn't think I would do. Well I did it and lived to tell the story. It is something really crazy that still amazes me that ME Raven Kuran walked out on the ice of Utah Lake!!! 

After realizing how solid the ice is we decided that it would be cool to get some pictures of Chelsea on the lake therefor making our photoshoot ON the lake. Crazy I know but It was fun. I'm not sure if I would ever do this again but I loved it. 

Life. Photography. Me.

I can officially say that I'm more then half way done with finals. I can't believe it. Just WOW!!!! Time flys by.

I'm no longer that little girl who has no care in the world. 

Running around using her imagination. 

Not caring with others have to say. 

Just living in her own world. 

Doing what she wants. 

Playing with her imagination.

I've grown into this wonderful young lady who has a ton of ambitions in life.

I'm still that crazy girl I've always been. I always will be. 

I'm just a much older version of that crazy girl. 

One who knows what she wants. 

Isn't afraid to fight for what she believes. 

Ready to do anything it takes to do what she wants. 

I'm determined and I know what I want in life. 

Age 19....I know who I want to be when I grow up. 

I want to be a photographer. 

I want to share with the world what is going on in my mind. 

How I see the world.

Bring things to reality that I never thought was possible.

Help others out.

Share my skills.

Strengthen my knowledge.

Volunteer.

Capture those special moments.

Savor the memories.

Create something new.

The list goes on.

I know what I want in life and I'm going to fight for it. It's who I am. I'm never going to give up my dreams just because one person puts me down. I'm going to fight and prove how good I can be. Prove that I can get better. That I'm not a failure. That I don't care what others have to say. I'm going to take that comment (from the good to the bad) and make my self and my work better. All it will do is make me better. It's just how I am. It's me. If you don't like it then that's your problem get over it. Your not changing me. I am who I am and I won't change for anyone. 

Fears

We all have fears and I've decided to put mine out in a list and blog it.

• Dying
• Spiders
• Automatic Flushing Toilets
• Elevators
• Not finding the right guy
• Not being able to have children
• Losing a family member
• Losing a friend
• Getting cancer
• Getting sick 
• Going into a coma
• War
• Gaining to much weight

These are just the one's I can think of right now but I have a ton more. My goal is to be able to overcome some of them. One step at a time and one million spiders dying a day. 

New Day New Outlook

Life's short.
Way to short too worry about the petty things that don't matter.
I've decided that no matter what happens in life I'm going to be happy with myself.


Happy of who I am, 
who I can become, 
what I can do, 
things I've accomplished, 
things I'll accomplish in the near future.


The list goes on.
There is so many things out there that can make one happy.
I've decided I'm going to look on the bright side of everything no matter what the situation is.


Always look on the bright side of life never on the down side and one will be happy.


Live life to the fullest
Never give up hope
You can accomplish anything you set your mind to
You are someone
Make a difference

Thankful for many things

Many of you know that I have a big heart and really care for anyone and everyone. My heart always goes out towards the families who are struggling while going though a trial in life. Whither it be a death in the family to someone having a disease to missing someone this holiday season I care for them all no matter what. They all have a spot in my heart, each and everyone of them.


One thing to be thankful for this holiday season is for all the doctors and people out there who care for all the children who have cancer and make it possible for them to live as long as possible and to have the best life that they can no matter what they are battling. 


(Please watch this video of a song Matthew West wrote about the story of a little boy named Dax who's parents were told he wouldn't make it to Christmas 2009)


Dax will forever be in our memories along with all the other children who have left before their time. Without them so many others wouldn't have the strength that they have today. Love these kids each and everyone of them. They have left such a big impact on this world and will continue to. Their story will carry on. 

19 things about me

19. I'm random
18. I can't drink regular milk without getting sick
17. I have really pretty eyes
16. I don't eat donuts, twinkies, cake, etc
15. I can't live without a camera
14. I don't know how to work a basic cell phone
13. I still fit in baby swings
12. I've been to over 30 states
11. I've sat on a real live gator.
10. I was an extra in the movie Holy Matrimony filmed in 1993
9. I barely graduated High School.
8. I LOVE photographing children
7. I can't wait to be a mom one day when I'm married
6. I have yet to break an actual bone
5. I've played the flute since I was 9
4. I have amazing friends
3. I plan to publish a book one day
2. I'm allergic to nickel earrings
1. I have one year left of being a teenager

Friends...one long journy

I've been thinking for awhile and I have realized that my friends have helped me out so much and have helped me become who I am today, so I thought I would write something sweet about all of you(If I forget to mention you don't feel bad just let me know and I'll put you in the next blog).

Ashley M: Girl you have been one AMAZING friend. You have helped me through the hard times and have always been there. You are one of the best friends a girl could ever ask for and I'm glade I can call you my sister. You are truly amazing, don't ever change.

Destiny C: I don't know what I would do with out you girl. You have made me feel so welcome since day one. You are really amazing and I love that about you. I love how you are so caring and free spirited. You are not afraid to make new friends and just be yourself.

Haley S: You are one amazing friend. I love how you love country music and want to keep it alive. You are so caring for others. When there is a big concert coming up you don't get caught up in your own world instead you want to help out others and get together with them a celebrate before the concert. Getting to know others. You are also a great photographer.

Nash: You are one of the greatest guys I've met. You have such a great personality. I love how you know all these random facts about anything. They always brighten my day when you tell me one of them. I sure do mess seeing you everyday.I also love how you can keep up with a 500+ comment conversation on facebook. I hope college is treating you great. Keep on learning random facts.

Brittnee M: You are a great friend. I love how you are always talking about guys and how cute they are. I know you will find the right guy soon. I'm so glade to have met you. I wish we could hang out more so we could get to know each other better.

Kellsie A: You are a great friend. I love your spirit for sports. I love how much you get into the games. You pay attention to every detail that happens and your not afraid to say something about the refs. You are truly a great friend and I love that about you.

Niki P: I love so many things about you. You are such a bright girl. I know you will go far in life. I love how you are able to handle two jobs at thanksgiving point. You seem like you do it so great. You are really great with kids who have a disability and I love that about you. I wish I could be more like that. You are an amazing girl.

Hannah S: There is so much I could say about you. You are a great friend. I'm so glade that we have gotten to know each other better the past couple of months. I love how fast you can fold a three headed dragon. It takes real talent to be able to do it how fast you can also on getting them as small as you can. I love how smart you are in math. You can be given any math problem and you will figure it out no matter how hard it is. You are always there for friends when they need you.

Shaundi: Girl, there is so much I can say and I'm sure I've told you a million times, but you have helped me out so much. You have so many great values and stuff. You seem to know a lot about life and you seem to always know what to do no matter what the situation is. You always try to make the best out of the situation and that is one of the things I love about you. You are also an AMAZING piano player and singer and I'm totally jealous of it. I hope that we can be able to make our friendship stronger. :)

Britteny O: You are such a great friend. I love how we have almost the same taste in music. We have had a bunch of great times together. I love how you have random games at your house and how your up for doing almost anything. You are a great friend and have so many great quality's. I love how you speak french also. :)

Lucie: You have always been a great person. I love how caring you are. I love your style. You are always posting the cutest stuff on Facebook. They always make me smile. I'm always looking forward to seeing what you post next. You have a bright spirit and I love that about you. You are always so honest. I love how you help me and Ashley out with our photography by giving your honest opinion.

Charles: You are one of the BEST big brothers that any girl could ask for. We may have our moments but I know that you are always there for me no matter what is going on. You can be crazy and stuff but I like it that way. I miss you a lot and can't wait to see you for Christmas this year.

Kasawndra: You are one of my best friends ever. We have been through so much since 6th grade. We have had tons of fun moments together and I wish we weren't so far away so we can have some more. You are one of the people who I know no matter what I can trust you. You are always there for me. I know you will be a great mommy and I'm so galde that you finally found the right guy and was able to get married to him. I love you and miss you lots.

Ashley K: You are a great girl. I love how you know so much about life and are not afraid to say what is on your mind. You are one who I can go and talk to. I wish we were closer and that we could get to know each other more. I know that one day we will get the chance to.

College

Wow. It's hard to believe...I'm not in High School anymore.

I'm graduated and not going back.

The newest chapter in my life is starting up.

College.

Never thought I would make it this far. Yet I'm here. I already know my major is.

Yet I'm having doubts about the school I've chosen to go to. I'm not quite sure this is the school I want to get my degree at. Everything I was told that they offer their for photography is not what I was told. They got rid of the film photography. One of the main things I was looking forward to college was getting to work on film photography. Learn how to take good quality film pictures, develop them myself, not going to happen at UVU.  I've started to look at other university's to see if they still offer film photography. From what I've found so far it looks like BYU still offers film photography along with digital, but I don't want to fully switch over there in till I have found out for sure that they DO offer film photography along with digital. If they do then I will finish up with my associate's degree at UVU. Getting all my generals out of the way that way once I transfer to BYU all I have to worry about is working toward my major.

In other news....Here's a run down of what college has been like so far.

• Free food randomly throughout the week
• Inflatible twister
• Lots of walking
• Backward bench
• Lots of free stuff (T-shirts, pens, footballs, pizza cutters, etc.)
• Lots of great new friends
• Cute guys
• Willy

Here are some pictures for your enjoyment....

Possibly one of the coolest seats ever

Best milkshake machine ever

Totally love these.

                                               

Only would a college put a bench backwards

 

Hannah confused

Just chillin

Willy

Some flip action

Willy on possibly the best invention ever

Happy to start a new chapter in life

                                                       

Peace out for now

Rae

Thank You

So many things have happened since I've last blogged.

As many of you know, I found out at the beginning of 4th term that I was messing some credits and that I might have to pull out of Lehi and go to East Shore and do packets to make up all the credits. (found this out before spring break) Then after spring break we found a way were I could still go to Lehi part time and go to East shore part time to make up the credits. It wasn't very easy and it was very hard to do. I had to do 18 packets at East Shore and honestly there were many times when I wanted to give up but I didn't. I kept on pushing on and I got them done.

If it wasn't for my friends pushing me to get them done so I can graduate on time with my class and walk at graduation I probably would have just gave up. Ya'll probably don't realize how much it means to me that you all were so supportive of me having to get these packets done and just being there for me means to me but it means the world to me. I couldn't have done it without you guys. Thanks soooooooooooooo much for being such great supporting friends and just being there for me. Just the little things like being there or when I was having a hard time and you sat down and talked to me and cheered me up means so much. Thank you. I love each one of ya'll and I honestly don't know where I would be if it wasn't for all of you. Thank you Thank you Thank you. 

I really want to thank the one's who were there the most for me(some of you I may have already thanked but I don't think I can thank you enough for how much help you truly have been to me)...

• Ashley - you are such a great girl who really cares for me and I'm glade to call you my sister. I don't know what I would do without you girl. You are one of the greatest people who has come into my life and I'm glade that you did.
• Shaundi - Thanks so much for making me feel so welcome at Lehi and for giving me some encouragement though the past couple of weeks. Also thanks for teaching me to write essays I'm pretty sure my essays rock now. 
• Hannah - Girl I'm really glade I met you. You always put a smile on my face. :) I'm glade to call you my granddaughter 
• Krista - You have been a great friend and thanks so much for just being there when I needed someone to talk to. 
• Charles - You are the best big brother ever. I don't know what I would do without you. Thank you for being a great role model to me and showing me how important it is to graduate from high school.
• Mom - Thanks for being there for me and taking me to and from East Shore so I could get the packets done.
• Dad - Thanks for being supportive. 

Thank you all sooooo much. Love each and everyone of you. You all are great friends. Thank you so much just for being who you guys are. I'm sure I'm forgetting someone if so Thank you for all that you have done for me. 

I still can't believe that this Friday. June 3rd. That I graduate from high school. I can't believe that I made it. Time has just flown by. So unbelievable. So exciting. I'm gonna miss all my friends I've made in high school.

Thank you all.

Lots of Love
Rae

Banana's

B-A-N-A-N-A I WANNA GO BANANA'S...BA BA BANANA'S

Yes it is true. I'm crazy and all that jazz. So what? It's who I am!!!

So Film Festival is coming up pretty excited to go to that. Lots going on and I really don't feel like talking about all of it. haha.


So I've decided that I have a problem and that I should go to rehab for it...yes yes....I'm addicted to gum. I have about 500 pieces or more of it. I'm pretty sure that if I wanted to I could break a world record on most chewed pieces of gum at one time. I'm still thinking about that. You never know I just might do it one day :)

Well guys it's great blogging to ya. Idk who you are probably some creep or someone who knows me. whatever. Thanks for liking my randomness!!!

Fancy and Dancy

Kinda wanted to blog...what about? I don't quit know yet, but I'll figure it out as I write I guess.

Well I guess a lot has been going on in my life regrading graduation and other stuff.

But I don't really feel like writting a blog about that at least yet. Maybe in the future...Maybe once I graduate. You'll just have to stay tuned and not touch that dial.

I got two words that need to be said and well I don't know how I'm gonna say it...I mean it's kinda hard to say...you know? Well I'm just gonna come out and say it....

Spring Break!!!!!!

Now that that's out....We can all be happy now :)) 

 So recently I decided I wanna try to be all fancy dancy lancy with my toe nails and just randomly decorate them so I decorated them pretty awsome I got to say.  

Well I guess that's it for now. Tell later............

Peace! 

Thoughts running through a whirlwind

Lately I've done a lot of thinking about life in general. Like how much I have changed as a person over the past year and just a bunch of other things.

Since moving to Utah, I have realized so much about life. Life is not about just your self and getting by. There is so much more to it then that. You won't always be friends with those who you were friends with for most of your life. Friendships come and go.

Since moving I have had a better understanding on who my TRUE friends are. They are the one's who reach out and keep in contact with me. They are the one's who were there for you during hard times. They listen to you and love you for who you are.

I have learned in my life that yes people are mean and there is nothing you can do to stop them from being that way. The only thing you can do is move on and ignore them. Your better then they are. Don't go down to their level and try to get payback. I have been through MANY hard times in life. I've been picked on. So what? That's life. I'm glade that those people where that way to me. It made me in the end a stronger person. The person I am today.

I often think back and wonder "Why did that girl have to make those fake emails and try to get me in trouble for stuff she did?" "Why were those kids mean to me when I was being a friend to someone who basically had no one to talk to?" "Why did that kid have to do the things he did to me and my friends?" These are just some of the many things that have been going through my head lately and there may be no answer to these questions at the moment or down the road but because of these hardships in life I've grown as a person and became better then I ever thought I would.

Many people ask me "How do you like it here?" "Do you miss Montana?" and the answer to those is. I LOVE it here! I wouldn't have changed it for anything. I'm glade that I moved here. Moving here is probably one of the best moves I've had in a long time. I'm happy here. I couldn't ask for anything better. I feel accepted for who I am and not for who I am not. I have made MANY great and AMAZING friends. I've made some great memories. If I didn't move here then I would probably still be confused, hurt, in denial, and a lot of other things. Moving here has changed me for the better. I know more of who I am and what I want in life. I know better now what is best for me and just a lot of other things that I probably would have NEVER figured out if I didn't move here. I'm simply blown away by how nice and welcoming everyone here is. I haven't felt this welcomed in a place since I moved in 4th grade to a new elementary school that was in the same town and I want to thank each and everyone of you guys that have made my life here such a great experience so far and for all the great memories that have been made and I can't wait to make more.

And for all of ya who are asking if I miss Montana....the answer is yes I do. I miss my brother and my friends, and my old ward, but that's it. I don't miss the school, the drama, having to always talk to the police cause someone's threatening me or a friend, the consent fear of getting hurt no matter were I am. I'm happy now and I'm glad I'm here now. Montana taught me a lot about life and I'm glad I got to learn that stuff about life.

I want to personally thank all of my friend here that I have made in the past year for making my senior year so great and just accepting me for who I am. I'd also like to give each of you a hug. You guys truly are amazing and don't let anyone tell you anything else. I look up to all of you for inspiration and advice. Thanks guys for being so kind and welcoming to me. I love each and everyone of you and when I can I'll be personally thanking you.

Lots of Love

Rae

I'm not Irish...Kiss Me Anyways

HAPPY ST PATRICK'S DAY!!!!!!!

Top of the morning!!! Haha...sorry had to. Well as many of you know it's ST PATRICK'S DAY!!!! woo!!! This is probably one of the most awesome-st holidays EVERRR haha jk. but it's pretty dang high up there.

I hope all of you remembered to wear your GREEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNN cause if not I'm pinching you RIGHT now! PINCHHHHHHHHHHHHH 

Here's a picture of my LOVELY outfit. :)

Well....there after me lucky charms so I got to go sell a kid to a leprechaun to get z pot of gold!

Layla my asian "daughter"

Where do I start at?

So This weekend has been a real adventure for me.

So I am taking a class in school called Adult Roles and we have been learning about marriage and families. To teach us how hard a baby really is they are having us take care of an electronic baby. I just got to say it's been really fun and stressful at the same time taking care of the "baby"

I got her Friday after school and at 3pm she officialy turned on. We were in the car on our way to walmart when she first went off. She wanted a bottle and so it wasn't that hard to feed her a bottle while still in the car since I wasn't driving. She took about 15-20 minutes to "eat". While we were in Walmart she was good when I was holding her and either rocking her, feeding her a bottle, or burping her. She probably cried about 3-4 times during the 30ish minutes that we were at walmart. Later on that night when I was eatting my dinner she decided that she wanted to cry. I don't know if she knew I was eatting or what but it was kinda hard to eat and take care of the baby at the same time. But I did figure it all out and was able to finish my dinner while taking care of her.

There was also a basketball game that night that some friends and I decided that we were gonna go to since it was the last game of the season. Of course I had to take Layla with me and that was pretty interesting. I dressed her up in one of my Lehi shirts that way she can show her school spirit it for her "mommy's" school. She did really good at the game till after half time. Then she sharted to cry. She needed to be rocked which took awile to do and I ended up going out into the hall with Kellsie to rock her. We were able to get her to be quiet to get back into the game to finish watching the game. It was a really great game. Then as we were leaving she decided that she needed a diaper change so as we are standing right outside of the school Kellsie dug in the diaper bag for the diaper as I took her diaper off of her while standing up and holding her then we put the new diaper on her as fast as we could.

My first night with her went okay I guess. She woke up a total of 4-5 times during the night. Most of the time she just wanted to have a bottle but there was one time that she wanted a diaper change.

Saterday was my 2nd day and the full day I had with her. She did really good throughout the whole day. She didn't cry that much and the day went really good. There was one part when I was at the dollar store with some friends that I got a really rude comment(s) from some lady who didn't seem to believe me that the baby was fake and for a class and she said some things she really shouldn't have said to me and she jumped to things that she shouldn't have and even though all the stuff she presumed and yelled at me about isn't true it still hurts on what she said to me. It may not be a real baby and she didn't say anything about the baby. She just said things to me about teen parents and then made assumptions on things about me as a person and on my own personal life that isn't true and she don't even know me so she doesn't know my personal life. I really don't understand why some people have to be so rude and just jump to things without even knowing things at all.

Oh well...moving on....

Later on that night I got to babysit for a family in my ward(church) and that was a great experince that I got. It was really easy since Layla was good for me and I got to learn how to do things while holding a baby.

Last night (the last night with her) was really nice and easy. She only woke up twice really. She woke up at 5 am wanting a diaper change then a bottle oh and also to be burped. She then woke up at 7:30 which is the time I needed to get up at anyways for today.

She did really good at church today. She was on quiet time but she did cry once and that was during sacrment meeting. She did a loud scream and just wanted to be rocked. She calmed down really quick so that was nice. She was quiet for the rest of church till church got over and then she cried after church wanting a diaper change.

She is now off. She turned off at 3:00 pm today and I'm kinda sad she's off but yet I'm glade that she is. It was a great learning experience. I learned that babies are not that easy as you may think they are and that they need to be taken care of when they cry and you never know what it is going to be for. I know that I won't be having a real baby for a long time. Not till I've been married for awhile and both me and my future husband feel that it is the right time to start having kids. They are a big responsibility and you don't always have someone there to help you out when you need the help. I have learned a lot from this assignment and I feel as if there are not enough words out there to express how I feel from this assignment and all of what I have learned. I recommend that if you want to learn how hard it is without really having a baby to get a hold of one of these electronic babies and to take care of it for awhile just so that way you know truly how hard it can be.

That is all I have to say for now.

Till next time


PEACE!!!!

xoxo
Rae

Hair Cut!!!!!!!

So for like EVERRRRRRRRRRR I've been wanting some kind of bangs and recently I decided that NO one is gonna stop me and that I'm gonna find a way to get them cut and as I was asking around for places that wouldn't charge to much to get it done, one of my friends (Shaundi) said that she could do it. So toward the end of class we went off to the bathroom and she started to cut my hair how I wanted it :) and it turned out to be REALLY cute!!!! I think I'm going to stick with this hairstyle for awhile now. :) (No Cathy I'm not gonna bob it like u say I should  :P)

And I'm sure I've said it a lot already but Thanks Shaundi!! You did an AMAZING job!!!!


Now I'm debating on if i wanna get my highlights redone and if so if i wanna go the same blond or do a brown that is darker then my hair. Ya'll will have to comment with your opinion on what I should do on that.

Well I guess I really don't have much other things to say right now so yah.

PEACE YODA

~Rae

P.S comment on what ya'll think of the hair :)

New Years

So I'm sooooo sorry this is SOOOOOO late but So far this year has been ehh okay. We can say last weekend wasn't the best and Friday was SOOOOO NOT my day! Saterday and Sunday didn't seem to get any better either and I ended up getting sick. pooo. But things are better now!

Now back to what this blog is on....

New Year!!!
So since this is my year, the year of my class, year of my graduation, whatever you wanna call it, I've decided I wanna make it a good year(even though I've already had a bad weekend it's still not to late to make it good) Here's somethings that I'm gonna do this year...

• Watch what I eat
• Eat healthyer(if that's even a word)
• Work out more(gonna start doing yoga man!)
• Keep my grades up and pass every class so I can graduate!
• Ask for help if I need help on something
• Learn better ways to photoshop/edit pictures
• Learn new takes on taking pictures
• GO TO COLLEGE!!!!!

Those are just some of the things I plan to do this year. I have a TOOOOONNNNNN more planned. 

For now...

PEACE YODA!!!!